A Firm Affirmation

Contributed by:
Eric Dunaway
small groups pastor

One of the most impactfull experiences I've had in my journey as a Christ follower was when a friend and mentor offered a few words of affirmation. They came after a period of time where I had been through probably the darkest year of my life. I had lost my job, we were struggling financially, I had been running from the Lord, and all this was taking a toll on our marriage. For several months I had been opening up to my mentor, sharing my struggles, my fears, and my hurts. And after some time, healing began to take place, and I began to feel that God was calling me into full time vocational ministry. Of course, I immediately began to wrestle with a sense of inadequacy. After all, I had, as I said, been running from the Lord... my relationship with him had been distant, at best, for the better part of three years. And at times, I felt like an 18 year follower of Christ who was still just a spiritual infant. In spite of that, I wanted to at least share this with my mentor, and get his take on it. I still remember the conversation - it was only almost seven years ago.

I told him that I was beginning to feel called back into ministry, but on a full time basis. He asked me what I thought that would look like, and for the first time I knew what it would look like. Youth ministry, I told him. And here's what I expected him to say: That's great, Eric. Now, let's take a look at where you're at spiritually. You've got a lot of work to do to get ready for that calling. Let's take the next year to pray about this, prepare for it, and so on. I'm excited for you... I believe you can do it... but you're just not ready for it yet. 

That's what I expected him to say. But that's not what he said. What he said was, Eric, I wish I had the budget to hire a full time youth pastor... I'd hire you right now. 

Even now, almost seven years later, those words bring such encouragement to me. They were words of affirmation. They were words that said, I believe in you. You can do it. I know where you've been, but I've seen how far you've come. God is at work in you. Keep it up, and follow his lead. 

One of the great things about community is that it provides an environment where affirmation can take place. In fact, one of the things that we've included in the ten habits of journey groups is affirming one another. As groups pursue life together, they have the opportunity to impact the lives of those within the group through words of affirmation. This is one of the reasons why community is so powerful and life-changing. My life was deeply impacted by words of affirmation. Think of how your words of affirmation might impact those in your group.

God has placed gifts and abilities into each one of us. He's working on each of us in different ways. He's nudging each of us in the direction of his will and purpose for our lives. Sometimes all we need is the gentle nudge from a close friend who can speak loving truth into our lives. Sometimes an encouraging word of affirmation is all that's needed to move someone into action. Maybe your words - spoken into the lives of those in your group - will be just what they needed to hear, when they needed to hear it, and will change the course of their lives forever.

Group Facilitators: you have a unique opportunity as you lead your group. You have the opportunity to watch those in your group as they grow and mature in their relationship with Christ. You have the opportunity to observe the gifts and abilities that God has placed within each of them. And you have the privilege to be that voice of affirmation. When you see a gift in someone, acknowledge it. Celebrate it. You may have a future journey group facilitator in your group. Or a future KidCity story teller, or worship team musician, or greeter in your group. You may have a future pastor or missionary in your group, and all they need to hear is someone acknowledge those gifts for them to accept that they're there.

The point is this: affirming one another really can change someone's life. You're voice of encouragement really can have a dramatic impact on those around you. Allow God to use your journey group to be a place where affirmation breaths new life into each one of you.

Take a minute to reflect on a time when someone's words of affirmation impacted you. If you want to, take a moment to share that in a comment on this blog (see the link below).